"If Chins Could Kill" [.]

[fiefoe]

Bruce Campbell's affection for working behind the scenes and the people who performed the work really shines through in his stories about Ron Webber, a craft service guy who first got to be on a TV show because he could pick up a guy over his head.

• Finally, you're stuck with the enemies of friends and you realize that those people turn out to be your relatives, so you go back to them again.
• Now, if you've ever had any experience with this form of plaster, you'd know that it heats up as it sets - ... a lot. Betsy Baker, head coated in this stuff, unable to see, hear or talk, began to jot furiously on a pad of paper: "Getting very warm... how much longer?"
• Chickens substituted for any form of impaled, chopped or pounded flesh. The turkey baster was wonderful for blood spurts and gurgling of any kind. Walnuts and celery became staples for breaking appendages.
• Readi-Mix concrete powder was chosen as the best substitute for moon dirt. My favorite image of this film was a hand-crafted sign, posted at the edge of the set proclaiming: "No liquids!"
• Strip did all the head nods, hoof steps and lip quivers for scenes where we had to interact. ... Strip was a great horse, but you wouldn't want to ride him - trick horses are too fidgety.
• The end of the line came when I found myself signing autographs in a Reno pawnshop.
• Expository dialogue is the hardest to memorize, because it always includes new names of places and people.
• Some actors play the dirty little game of screwing up their lines in every take except their close-up.
• There are intangible qualities that actors can embrace or reject. For example, they must ask themselves, Should I eat lunch with the crew?
• (On Hercules,) with the two lead actors sporting long hair, I was encouraged to find locations that weren't overly windy.

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