"A Short History of a Small Place"

[fiefoe]

We are in High Comedy territory where wackiness unfolds like the skin of an onion, and there's always an appreciative throng at hand to witness all. Highlights:

• The mayor's sister's pet monkey forms the unfortunate habit of making water from the top of the flagpole in the yard.  Neely citizens form 'various streams of thought on the urinary problem', (to wit: the Isolationists, the Hard Liners, the Protectionists, the astrological-minded Mossians, and the anti-anti-Christ Butlerites,) but the Free-Thinkers (and monkey nature) win out at the end of the day. AND THAT'S JUST THE BEGINNING.
  
• Poppa Throckmorton, after being devastated in the stereoscope business, runs wildly off to widow Mrs. Ware's house where 'he dove under the duster on the north end of the bed and came out on the south end with Mr. Ware's shotgun in his hands and a hairball dangling from each elbow.' AND THAT'S JUST THE BEGINNING.
• Pinky Throckmorton places a thoroughly nailed piece of plywood on his windowsill to deter the pigeons from landing there, but it gets knocked off, fells to the sidewalk 'where it hit pointy side foremost and very nearly aerated' Mrs. Greenly's schnauzer, Sweetums. AND THAT'S JUST THE BEGINNING.

A couple of phrases I like to use myself: to collect (oneself), to take the airs, to see clear to, to take silent counsel with oneself.