("Attack of the Theatre People") + "Angus, Thongs and Full-Frontal Snogging"

This is a great book to be read (or sometimes sung) to (courtesy of Jeff Woodman), as Marc Acito quotes from plays and musicals like other people with their bible.

• Marian Sedles folds one attenuated leg over another like a cricket about to commence a solo. “Dirge for a Drama Student".
• Her cheekbones are like bookshelves above which sit eyes that spoke volumes.
• ... loses shoes at parties and tries to hug police horses.
• I stink, therefore I ham.
• In the words of Sally Bowles - 'What good is sitting alone in your room?'
• I won't be pitied by anyone. Except, of course, myself.
• ... plus a swirling staircase, the kind where aging divas make entrances in musicals. It takes every bit of testosterone I have to resist racing up a flight and belting out a show-stopper about living life to the fullest.
• He gives me a look that's equally malevolent and condescending, Rasputin teaching day care.
• I know I was being petty. ... If I were underwear, I’d be a petticoat.

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Louise Rennison's is a less interesting book, but unfortunately I finished listening to this first, hitting my quota for self-absorbed, juvenile people telling me about their drama-filled life.

• I lay on my arm until it went numb and then I lifted it (with the nonnumb arm) onto my brests. I wanted to see what it felt like to have a strange hand on them.
• Should I wear my bra to the party?
• Maybe if we are going to be forced to commune with the devil, I could strike some sort of bargian with him, lie swap my dad's soul in exchange for bigger breasts for the party on Friday.
• 'your fancy man' / No thanks, I would rather put my head in a bag of eels.
• I shall become the Wimbeldom Champion after all. White suites me.
• He looked at me as if I was speaking a foreign language. But I wasn't, I was just talking rubbish.